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Posts by Melissa Affolter

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Handle With Care | A Book Review

HWC Jesus

I don't remember a time when I've been grateful for my body. There are many reasons for this I suppose, some of which I'll likely never understand. Growing up, I played softball in grade school, volleyball and basketball in middle school and high school. I knew my body was capable of doing challenging things. I didn't think I was particularly skinny or fat, until someone c...

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The "D's" of Christmas


It's not lost on me that these soul troubles are all words beginning with the letter "d." We find similar vocabulary in the scriptures as we look at how sorrow and sin affects the human heart....

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Over the past four years, Beholding & Becoming has served over one hundred people throughout Volusia County, providing Christ centered, clinically informed, compassionate counseling. We've always sought to make our services accessible to anyone seeking hope in the midst of hardships. ...

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A Call to Ministry

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We're combatting lies -- lies people believe about themselves, about God, about sin, about how change happens....

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The darkness of grief

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How do we reconcile the deep darkness of this life with the promised kindness of God? It comes in the forms of doubting questions, anguished faces, and angry accusations. ...

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What have I done to deserve love like this?


I'm a weak person in many ways. When I enter a season where these weaknesses are magnified and the painful (but necessary) work of pruning is in full swing, I start to see just how many lies I believe about God and about myself. It always boils down to my own disbelief that God loves me, and that he's merely tolerating me....

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Goodness and good things


But to me, these little moments -- these heart interactions where we are reminded (and reminding others) that we are known and loved -- are true soul care. ...

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Valued and esteemed


You can never go wrong with lovingly reminding the single woman, the childless woman, the grieving mother...that she is as valued and esteemed, and as vital to the ministry of the Lord, as the woman who has a house full of little ones....

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Letter to a suffering spouse


My Dear Sister and Friend, A couple of things come to my mind every time I think of you, which has been almost daily in recent months. You are right that no one can possibly understand how hard this has been, and continues to be for you. You have felt betrayed, unloved, stricken, misled, and so many other deeply painful things. ...

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Poisons into medicine


The hand of God is so strong, and His wisdom is so admirable, that He turns to our profit and advantage not only the evils which are caused by cross events, or by the world, but those which we commit ourselves, and that seem to be contrary to our salvation, even those which we are guilty of. He changes these poisons into medicine, these scandals into edification, and from ...

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Singleness in Community

you're not alone

It's easy to make our hard harder than the next person. We all compare our trials. And every person's hard is legitimately hard to them. My aim in drawing attention to these stats is not to hold up singleness or single parenting as the hardest thing. But I will say that this is one of the main things that brings unmarried women into the counseling room. Loneliness and wear...

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She knows my sin


My heart is quick – and eager – to return to its previous ways. Sins that I thought had been overcome seem to be stirred up in an instant, and rear themselves into my life with fresh zeal....

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God's ways are opposite


There is a pattern we find in Scripture. Things we assume to be one way, are turned upside down. It's the opposite of what seems natural. In human terms, we operate on conditions and assumptions of how we know the system typically works. Our experience tells us we can count on these assumptions; assumptions pressed into us from the world....

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A lesson in emotions from the life of Helen Roseveare


For nearly twenty years, Helen Roseveare served as a missionary in the Republic of Congo, establishing medical services in the remote village of Ibambi. She persevered despite periods of civil unrest, lack of resources, and even amidst the revealing of personal weaknesses and failures, which sometimes threatened to undo her. In most biographical descriptions of Helen’s l...

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Irrational Seasons


I don't often have the time to take my scattered journal entries and compile them formally, but I've always loved to write. My week away provided a little more opportunity to do so. I pray that in some small way these mediations would encourage someone, if in no other way than as a reminder that you are not alone. ...

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